This Post Will Make You Feel Good About Your Life
I don't like writing here when I don't think I know what I'm trying to say.
Not to say that I knew all those other times, but this time, I am really pretty conscious of the fact that I have no idea what the fuck I'm going to do.
There are three things that a screwing up the perfect world of puppy dogs and rainbows that I have built for myself. Ignorance is bliss, and I seem to have found plenty of both. As long as ignorance also counts as not completely thinking through your feelings, doing something for three years because you can, and then throwing a fit when you realize what you've done.
To some of you, this may come as a surprise. To others of you, this may just come.
I'm quitting my job.
In, like, a couple months when I find something else to do. As it turns out, and I'm taking a big risk here, because students read this thing sometimes: my job is just a huge farce. In other words, this stuff is like the chocolate cake melting in the sun, so good until something real gets to it and destroys! Destroys!
That being said, there is also the moral (and you thought I didn't know that word) obligation to make a difference to someone somewhere. Not that you can't in this job, but there's that paragraph that I just wrote that is making it complicated. Plus, I can do more somewhere else. Somewhere else meaning in another field, in another state, in another frame of mind.
So all those days I didn't write, I promise I was thinking of you all. All 300something of you (why do you keep coming here?) who checked in even though that crap from a week ago was still up. I was writing in my mind, look at it that way.
What's my motivation here?
Not to say that I knew all those other times, but this time, I am really pretty conscious of the fact that I have no idea what the fuck I'm going to do.
There are three things that a screwing up the perfect world of puppy dogs and rainbows that I have built for myself. Ignorance is bliss, and I seem to have found plenty of both. As long as ignorance also counts as not completely thinking through your feelings, doing something for three years because you can, and then throwing a fit when you realize what you've done.
To some of you, this may come as a surprise. To others of you, this may just come.
I'm quitting my job.
In, like, a couple months when I find something else to do. As it turns out, and I'm taking a big risk here, because students read this thing sometimes: my job is just a huge farce. In other words, this stuff is like the chocolate cake melting in the sun, so good until something real gets to it and destroys! Destroys!
That being said, there is also the moral (and you thought I didn't know that word) obligation to make a difference to someone somewhere. Not that you can't in this job, but there's that paragraph that I just wrote that is making it complicated. Plus, I can do more somewhere else. Somewhere else meaning in another field, in another state, in another frame of mind.
So all those days I didn't write, I promise I was thinking of you all. All 300something of you (why do you keep coming here?) who checked in even though that crap from a week ago was still up. I was writing in my mind, look at it that way.
What's my motivation here?
posted by Megan at
7:15 PM
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